March 17, 2003
Good Byes Aboard
Yesterday we bid farewell to Bill, and it
seems Curt and I hadn't seen each other in ages. For the first
time in weeks, we sat down to read email, to catch-up on our
respective friends' and families' news with each other, and
to think more seriously about what happens in the coming months.
It reminds me that in the fluidity of our life afloat, I still
feel like a fish out of water. As I sit here on Force Five
at anchor in Vieques, I can't help but feel stuck between
two worlds and not really part of either.
In reading emails from California,
I find that life at home has gone on without us. Whatever
space we left behind when we set sail last April has nearly
all but closed up. Friends email less, but what I hear when
they do write is that there are new boyfriends we've never
met, babies that have been born we haven't seen, new houses
we have yet to help warm. And here in the Caribbean, our fluid
home, we've made friends that have sailed along with us, and
then gone on- sailing off with no certainty of if and when
we may see them again. Just a few days ago, we waved good
bye to Second Kiss from the stern of our boat: certain not
to see them again in the Caribbean- but hoping to catch up
with them on their visit to California this summer. In a bay
that felt like home with these friends anchored as neighbors
at our side, it now felt like a strange place: Emptier beyond
the physical space they left behind. For cruisers, it is a
way of life, I know. And perhaps at least one part of this
life that I will never grow accustomed to. The good byes are
too many, and the only thing certain- is the uncertainty.
This is one aspect of life onboard I know I will never miss...
unlike the friends we bid farewell to.